Okay, in my place I use a Swiffer. As long as you contribute to the household chores, broom, Swiffer, it doesn’t matter. (I take that back…use the Swiffer. It gets up more dirt. You should know that.)
Turns out women are making great strides in the workplace…but not at home. They still do the majority of the housework, despite working just as many hours, with just as great a commute, as their male counterparts.
What makes it worse, to me, is that men actually gain self-esteem when they help out at home. Guess why. Because they see themselves as good guys, they kind who help out their women. Not entirely sure I’m fond of that reasoning, but for the moment, I’ll go with it, if it helps turn the tide. Sometimes you have to use what’s working against you to get things to work for you.
My married friends tell me their husbands are never sexier than when they’re doing the dishes. Unless it’s when they’re doing the laundry.
If it’s so easy to make their wives happy, why don’t the men do it more often?
Well, part of the problem is, they believe they are doing just as much as their wives. Yet study after study shows it simply isn’t true.
Another problem? Old attitudes die hard, and I suppose sports programming gets in the way, too. Sometimes the women are at fault, because the men say, “I’ll do it after…” and their wives get tired of waiting. I say, wait it out.
Especially if it’s laundry. Let him wash his own darn underwear. Oh wait, I see the flaw(s) in my thinking…
I don’t know the answer to this problem. Either the man gets it or he doesn’t, it seems, and yet despite my light tone in this piece it is a serious problem. Women are tired and depressed, and getting some help with housework actually would make a difference.
Changes need to be made. It’s as simple as choosing to make a decision that will make your spouse happier, healthier and more relaxed. And it isn’t that difficult to do a load of laundry or three, but when it comes on top of a day at work, a nightmare commute, getting dinner on the table…and off…not to mention caring for the the kids, it can push you over the edge.
I’m not saying all men do nothing. I’m sure most contribute to the household in some way. But by and large, the burden still falls on the women.
Take an honest assessment. Don’t look at how much you’re contributing, look at the other person. If their hours start to tally faster than your minutes, do something about it.
Like pick up a broom, er, Swiffer. Those things aren’t just for sweeping, they work for mopping, too.
Photo Credit: © dandaman — Fotolia
My World With Words 
Back in December, when I started having all these surgeries, my husband (who is retired) started helping with ‘my chores’: vacuuming, washing floors, washing/drying dishes, doing laundry (with my guidance), stripping/making the bed, even doing the food shopping (after I made out the list). Revelation! He had no idea how hard all of this was. And he was amazed that I had been doing all of this WHILE I WORKED. Wow. I am so much better now, but he still does the vacuuming, washes the floors and the dishes. Yes, I liked the Swiffer, too, but he doesn’t and he’s washing the floors, so……
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I’m sorry it took such a crisis to get him to realize how much work you were doing, but glad the lesson stuck! And if he’s doing the floors, far be it from me to be picky about the tool used!
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Love this post! It is funny but so very true. I had this conversation with my ex-husband when we were married. His mother informed me that there was quite a bit more that he could do, especially after our daughter was born. The problem with him doing the laundry though was that everything came out pink. I’m just saying…However that doesn’t mean there weren’t other things he couldn’t do. I would like to say that although I believe I did everything I could to keep our marriage together and as a stay-at-home mom that included everything. My day was just as busy as his. It included paying bills online and at the physical location, school functions, doctor appointments, grocery shopping, planning meals, cleaning house, etc., etc., etc. And, on top of that, being ready to listen to how his day went when he got off. He worked the night shift. At any rate, he believed (found out at the end) that because he went to work, that was all he really needed to do. Plugging into the family emotionally and spiritually was extra and fell on me as well “because I had more time.” The problem was I couldn’t find it.
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I think you speak for most women I know. I kept it light, but it’s a serious problem for many, and one with an easy solution. But lots of men see it the way your ex-husband did, or simply are oblivious to the whole thing.
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