Multiple Paths

Here I am, waiting for the next phase of my life to begin. Except it’s already started. I just don’t know where it’s going.

For so long I’ve been waiting for this point, and now that it’s here, it’s harder than I imagined. Those of who’ve been following my blog for any length of time know that I suffered a terrible setback in my life, an injustice that nearly destroyed me. Now I’m beyond the worst of that, but thrown into a whole new slew of obstacles.

It’s hard to job hunt when you’re over — a certain age. I’m there, and while it didn’t hurt me a year ago (I eventually lost that job), now I believe it’s holding me back. There’s that, and the fact that I’ve been freelancing for so long that I don’t have any recent office experience. So now I’m looking at starting a new chapter in my freelancing, and the prospects are intriguing.

Fortunately I’ve been able to find part-time work, even though the pay is horrid. But anything helps.

I’ve heard it said before if you don’t have goals you’ll end up nowhere. But what do you do when your goals appear to be unreachable? I’m trying to set new goals, but that’s a challenge, too. Things are never what you expect them to be.

Ah, life. It seems to challenge some of us more than others. Having said that, I don’t know what unseen challenges others face. Still, I think it’s fair to say some of us deal with more than others, but how do you determine levels of pain in another’s life? You don’t.

Most of my life people have assumed I’ve been very sheltered and I’m naïve about the world around me. I don’t know exactly why they believe it, but it frustrates me. Even people I’m close to, those who know in detail what I’ve dealt with, come around to thinking I’m wide-eyed and innocent. I’m not, but I’m not about to try to prove it.

The best thing I can do at this point is set daily and weekly goals and leave the future a bit undefined. My current long-term goal? Financial independence. I’m trusting one of the paths I’m following will lead me there.

If not, I’ll have to forge a new path.


Image Credit: © ©ablokhin – stock.adobe.com

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11 Replies to “Multiple Paths”

  1. I think the future is a bit undefined for all of us – even with well-laid plans, Belinda. I love your openness and honesty. I feel your frustration.
    That’s an interesting insight about people seeing you as sheltered. Perhaps bitter and jaded would represent “worldliness?” I think your softer nature has been misunderstood.
    I sense you are hopeful about your future and accepting of things. I’ll pray something good comes your way soon! It’s overdue.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Belinda, I wish you all the best with the paths you choose. I, too, have people – who know me; strangers – automatically assume silly things about me, like I’m naive and lack drive just because I am quieter and better mannered. I used to have enormous courage…I lived in another country without knowing anyone there and having to get by with a completely different language and earn a living, for example.

    You can do it.

    Faith 🙂 xo

    Liked by 1 person

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