I belong to a writer’s group, and we’re always open to new members. It brings a new life and new perspective to the critiquing process, something any good writer welcomes. But we have a hard time finding the right people. That’s not to say people who are right with us, but rather, people who think we’re right for them.
We had one young woman we all liked and we thought she liked us, until she bowed out saying she didn’t have the time to write that she thought she would. Now, we don’t demand much, if anything, of our writers. If they don’t have time to write, they don’t have to submit. That seems to happen to everyone. We always have enough submissions to make the meetings worthwhile. So her excuse fell a little flat.
Later, we discovered through a mutual acquaintance of one of our members and this young woman, that she was intimidated by our ages. The youngest is in his thirties, but I’m the second youngest and I’m 63. The oldest is 88. She shouldn’t have been intimidated. She should have welcomed the experience.
Especially since she was majoring in 20th century history. Wow, what we could have shared with her based on our personal experiences and the stories from our parents. It might have added a whole new life to some of her lessons.
I know it’s difficult sometimes reaching out beyond your own age group, and there’s a discomfort if you’re primarily surrounded by people your own age. Recently I visited my dad in Palm Desert, CA, and we went to the Living Desert, which is a zoo featuring desert animals from around the world (including some wallabies, such as the ones pictured here just for fun.). We happened to be there on a day when they had Halloween treats and activities for the kids. It was also one of the first weekends in a very long time with tolerable outside temperatures.
My dad was uncomfortable around all these children. He’d been equally uncomfortable a few months before around all the college students, and even their parents, when he attended my nephew’s graduation from Tulane. He’s used to being with others in their 70s and 80s (he’s 87). Now, my dad gets along well with people and he’s not reclusive, He just mostly hangs out with people his own age.
But I hope we all can reach out beyond our comfort zone and learn from others in a different age group, whether they’re younger or older. History has value, but so does the latest cutting edge technology. We all have value.
Image Credits: Wallabies © dennisjacobsen–stock.adobe.com; People of All Ages © Kai Alves–stock.adobe.com; Woman at Computer © MP Studio–stock.adobe.com.
My World With Words 
That’s too bad she left. Sounds like she hardly gave it a try.
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Yeah, I don’t think she did, and I think we all would have benefited if she stayed.
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I agree, Belinda, especially because nowadays, you’re much more likely to be in contact with a few different generations, as opposed to decades past.
We all need to get used to being comfortable with one another.
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There’s so much we can gain by learning to understand and appreciate each other.
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It sounds as if she lacked the confidence to be within a group of wisdom. I’m glad she stuck her toe in and hopefully it helped her see a few things she can look forward to. I’m with your Dad. Children are loud, but all ages fill in a segment of life we can learn from. 🧡
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Yes, children are loud, but like you said, we can learn from all ages. Still, I don’t expect my dad to reach out to those with little ones anytime soon, and I guess I can’t blame him.
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flow my site
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How interesting. I wonder if people, especially through the pandemic when they found their “pods” have gotten used to be able to just pick and choose and therefore reduced the size of their comfort zone. But I’m with you, diversity brings goodness and growth!
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Yes, it does! I’m one of the oldest in my department at work, and I really appreciate the others around me.
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No doubt there is much wisdom in your group. Maybe that’s something you appreciate towards midlife.
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You very well may be right. In my case, I see it in my parents, so that may have helped pave the way to see it in others.
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It is boring to be always around people who think like you! It does not allow you to grow as a person. 🙂
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So true! Diversity is key to being a well-rounded person.
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Belinda, I just read an article about age differences in the workplace. Your post made me think of my prior employer when they decided they needed to develop a diversity committee to better serve the organization. They listed a number of areas where discrimination could occur, but not surprisingly left out age. It’s not just that older employees don’t get the respect they deserve, but older employees often are not appreciating what younger employees bring to the table. An example of at least one workplace that just did not get it when it comes to the fact ageism is very real, and is an issue “both ways.” I retired from there with multiple, real-world instances where work would have been more efficient if both “sides” simply respected one another’s thoughts and ideas.
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I couldn’t agree more.
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