A Little Older, A Little Wiser

Two months ago, a co-worker told me, with much excitement, that her daughter had met the man of her dreams. He had already started making elaborate Valentine’s Day plans that would include her daughter (we’ll call her Jackie), her son (Jackie’s brother), and Jackie’s three-year-old boy, who we’ll call Alec. Liz, my co-worker, thought it sounded great that he wanted to get to know her whole family and was accepting of the fact that she’s a single mom.

Liz went on to say that this miracle man had told Jackie he wasn’t into casual relationships but wanted something serious. Red flags were going up everywhere for me, but Liz was so pleased with this situation that I kept quiet. Well, my face maybe revealed my thinking, but I didn’t say anything. I could see where Liz would be happy, but it just didn’t sit right with me.

Well, two weeks later Dream Boat gave himself away when he learned that Alec’s father was still in the picture. Now, Alec’s father is not a good person and has since been banned by Children’s Services from seeing his son, but that wasn’t the point at the time. Dream Boat flew into a jealous rage and Jackie stopped talking to him as a result. It looked like the fire had gone out, and I was glad to hear it.

However, Valentine’s Day came upon us and Dream Boat sent Jackie 300 red roses with a tiara in the middle and a banner bearing her name. Later a box from Crumbl Cookies arrived with a note saying his life had just begun when he met Jackie. Red flags red flags. Jackie fell for it and starting talking to him again. Liz bore down on her daughter and told her this man was stalker material. Both Liz and I knew a vulnerable young woman like Jackie was at risk.

Eventually, one of Jackie’s close friends learned about Dream Boat and told Jackie the same thing Liz had been saying–this man is trouble. Jackie cut it off, and while he’s still calling from time to time, he hasn’t been as persistent in pursuing her as we all feared he might be.

It’s hard for parents to tell their children to bail out of a given situation, especially when the kids are enchanted by some part of it. I remember my mom telling me stop working for the man who gave me what I later called my dream job from hell. At the time Mom warned me, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to travel through Europe. I continued on this job until it became evident the disadvantages far outweighed the advantages, and given how exciting those advantages were, you can guess how bad that job got.

As I get older and find myself less valued by a society that places such worth on youth and innovation, I am saddened that the wisdom I’ve gained isn’t respected as much as it should be by the younger generation. There are exceptions, and I’m grateful for those. My lament is the same as those seniors who’ve gone before me, and I suppose when those currently enjoying the prime of their life age and grow gray they will be saying the same thing. But it’s sad.

I can only hope that some things I say make sense to those who think they know better than me. I’m not saying I’m the bearer of all wisdom, but hey, a little older, a little wiser.

Image Credits: Owl © Nattapat; Cupid’s arrow © Vink Fan; Red Flag ©  Kamonwan; Seniors ©  chacha — all, stock.adobe.com

I Had It All Worked Out…

Man plans. God laughs.

While I’ve always somewhat dismissed the above saying–I don’t believe God laughs and it’s a bit offensive to my faith–I do get the point. For the last couple of years I’ve been making plans to retire. Now it seems those plans may not come about as quickly as I’d hoped.

It was difficult for me to get up this morning, the Monday after daylight saving time started. It’s always a challenge to get out of bed on Mondays, in part because I let myself sleep in on the weekend against all expert advice, and in part because I just don’t want to go to work. In the past I’ve been able to say, okay, just x number of months left before you can retire. Now the time has stretched out considerably longer than a mere count of months.

I’m also concerned because I can no longer afford to visit my mom in Minneapolis. She’s getting older and I know I could lose her at any time. Don’t get me wrong, she’s not in failing health per se, but it is a struggle for her to walk very far. Plus, her memory is spotty. My plans after retirement include moving to Minneapolis myself, but of course that’s looking like it will take a little longer than expected as well.

However, I refuse to give in to the frustration of dashed hopes. I can be stubborn and I’ll put that quality to good use in this situation. Perhaps there is a strong reason things aren’t rolling out as I’d hoped. I guess I may never know about that for sure, but I do believe God is in control. My faith is getting stronger. That’s due in part to a renewed commitment to pray and read the Bible (don’t worry, I’m not going to preach) as well as a priest at my Episcopalian church who speaks to our relationship with God and his nature. It’s uplifting, something I haven’t experienced in church as often as I’d like.

So, I’m going to keep on planning, adjusting my ideas to each new factor that affects my decision. Until I hit my target, this woman plans, and no one laughs.

Image Credits: Target (header) © alexdndz–stock.adobe.com; Stubborn Fox © Jean–stock.adobe.com

Walter is Resting

We went to the vet recently for a routine checkup, and fortunately, Walter is healthy. However, the ride over, the wait in the lobby, and the shots were all traumatic for him, despite the treats and loving care from the vet. So now he’s taking a nap to regroup.

Image Credits: Cesar Cat © Belinda O; Paws in Heart © Bigstock; Sleeping Cat Illustration © PhotoArtHub–stock.adobe.com

Happy Happy Birthday, Beth

I hope you’re doing well and you’re able to celebrate your day in a special way. I think about you often. Take care of yourself and remember there are people–including me–who love you and want the best for you.

Image Credit: Happy Birthday © Hulinska Yevheniia–stock.adobe.com

Getting to Know You–One Way or the Other

Daily writing prompt
In what ways do you communicate online?

I have to admit, I haven’t really gotten into too much online communication other than this blog. Okay, I’m on Facebook, but I rarely post. WhatsApp is something I’d like to explore since my uncle, who now lives in Portugal, uses that. But Instagram, Tik Tok, all the rest hold no interest for me.

I work with a woman who uses Tik Tok excessively. She gets all her news from that app, and it’s often wrong. I’ve told her she should find her news from reputable sources, but she just shrugs. While I’m sure some of what she reads is accurate, I know a lot of it is not.

What’s interesting to me is she wasn’t aware of the looming Tik Tok ban. It’s possible, although no one is quite certain about this, that the app could go dark after January 19. I’m not sure what my colleague would do after that, given her reliance on Tik Tok for news, entertainment, makeup tips, and a dozen other things I don’t remember right now.

I hate the thought of relying so much on social media, although I’ll be the first to admit it’s the only way I stay in contact with many of my friends from college. I’ve found it interesting to see how much some of us have changed our world views from one end of the spectrum to the other. We bond together and support each other through Facebook (as I’ve said before, I rarely post, but I keep up with other’s posts). I also get really good book suggestions from my friend Sue.

I still favor more personal communication, such as meeting in person with my friends or phone calls. Okay, I rarely use the phone, but I do text. The one-on-one conversations are much more satisfying to me than anything I can get on social media.

Still, I’ve made some friends through this blog, and I care about all of them. I want to know what’s next in their lives. Through our posts I’ve gotten to know about how they relate to the world around them and some details that delight me, for example, a love of cats. If something happened to one of them, I would grieve.

Will my relationship with social media change? Who knows. My life is bound to be different in the next couple of years, so perhaps my dependence on social media will be, too.

Image Credits: Wooden Figurines © Valerii Evlakhov–stock.adobe.com; New View © muhammad–stock.adobe.com; Cat © Yana–stock.adobe.com