I’ve found that most people who call someone they’re in love with their soulmate are actually still in the infatuation stage of a relationship. It’s easy to see the connection then–everything seems perfect. You both like the same food, same entertainment, same kinds of pets. You were meant to be.
And that may be true. I do believe, to a certain extent, that there is a power that draws us into relationships. I have friends who’ve been happily married for forty years or more. I was there when they first met each other and lived through the ups and downs of courtship and the forces that brought them to the ultimate decision: we’ll get married.
Those friends can tell me they’re with their soulmates and I’ll believe them. You go through that many years of marriage and you’ve seen the ups and downs of life together–sometimes, perhaps, less together than you’d want to be, but in the end, you’re still with that same person.
Interestingly, though, I’ve never had a friend or relative who’s been in a long-term relationship call their significant other “my soulmate.” Perhaps, like me, they see that as a naive belief. When you’re together for a long time, you discover there are a lot of differences between the two of you, and you’re not the perfect match you initially thought you were.
That’s not to say that your relationship is bad. People are flawed, and it’s sometimes difficult to discover those flaws in someone we love. But that’s also the beauty of settling in to being together. You learn to work it out. You learn to love.
I had a boyfriend who ended up breaking up with me because he didn’t think we were soulmates. I asked him what he thought a soulmate was, and he said it was someone you were completely in sync with. You never disagreed with each other because you were destined to live happily ever after.
Yeah, he’s still single.
Image Credits: Couple Holding Hands (header) © Pete–stock.adobe.com; Birds in Love © Celestynka–stock.adobe.com


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