Aquarius, two

My sister and share little in common, despite being, well, sisters and growing up only a year apart in the same household. That’s almost exactly a year apart, making us both Aquarians. We share little in common but the traits of our Zodiac symbol.

Aquarians are creative, and that is incredibly true of both of us, although our creative abilities are very different. I’m the writer, she’s the artist. I can barely draw a stick figure yet Beth is very talented in that area and always has been. She has an inherent sense of proportion, for example. that I am woefully lacking. Beth is also a better writer than I am artist.

Aquarians are notoriously independent thinkers, which can make us stubborn, to say the least. You can see how this might divide my sister and me, although we rarely argued growing up. The divide came more in the form of isolation–my brother and sister were close and shut me out. That was devastating.

Yet we were also stubbornly loyal to each other. You didn’t criticize one of us to another without incurring some wrath. And if I knew Beth was in pain, I was there for her, although she oftentimes rebuffed my attempts to comfort her. Perhaps I did the same, I don’t know.

Aquarians are idealistic, something that, at least at one point in time, was vitally true of both of us. I’ve grown more cynical as I’ve gotten older, and I don’t know if the same is true of my sister. Because, you see, Beth has separated herself from the family and I haven’t heard from her in nearly twenty years.

That breaks my heart, and I know she has distanced herself because of her own pain. Which brings me to this point: Aquarians are sensitive and tend to internalize their own pain.

How can two women with so much in common have so little to share with each other? I want my sister back, although, after all this time, I don’t know what we’d say. And knowing she doesn’t want to be a part of my life hurts terribly.

Beth, you are loved.

Image Credit: ©EllerslieArt –

11 Replies to “Aquarius, two”

  1. Wow, Belinda – this post breaks my heart. The past cannot be changed, but certainly moving forward it sounds like with your wish – reconnecting might be possible.
    Oh, my. The vulnerability it would take to reach out. With risk comes rewards – such a cliche. But honestly, it sounds to me like you might be ready to try. That’s all you can do.
    Such honesty and beautiful sharing. I wish I could hug you.
    PS. I don’t have a sister and always pined for one.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh…I’m sorry. Distance from a sister so like you is heartbreaking. No one can share our family history the way a sibling can. No one can help us the way a sister can…I hope she sees this. I hope she’s looking for a way back.

    Liked by 1 person

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