I’ve written about this before, so forgive me if you have read it already. But the best piece of advice I ever got was actually not exactly advice, but an observation from which you can draw your own conclusion. When I was in my 20s, my dad told me, “whether times are good or times are bad, we always think they’re going to last.”
If times are bad, we may not see a way out. If they’re good, we naively believe the good times will keep on rolling. I needed to hear that back then because my life was on a rocky road and I didn’t see an end in sight. By the time I hit 30, things had changed and I thought I was set for life (talk about naive!).
While my life has been on an even keel lately, I know that could change in a moment. My mom is 89 and has outlived her parents by quite a bit. I believe she’s likely to die suddenly, perhaps a stroke, and I know it could happen any day. My dad is also 89 and longevity runs in his family, so it wouldn’t surprise me if he lived another ten years. He’s very active, his mind is sharp, and he’s going strong.
But we got a bit of bad news last week about my uncle, my dad’s brother, who’s 92 and was also expected to live into his late 90s, just as their two older brothers and father had done. He has lung cancer and has been given 12-18 months to live (FYI, he’s not a smoker). That breaks my heart, and my dad is crushed as well. I hope to see my uncle in April, but there are a lot of ifs about that trip.
So you just never know what the day will bring. Tornadoes, fires, hurricanes–all of these hit innocent people on a regular basis.
But eventually the good comes back. My dad has buried two wives, one who had cancer and the other Alzheimer’s. Today, while the pain of those events lingers, he’s doing well. His long-time friends stepped up and he’s made new friends as well. He couldn’t golf much while Jeanne, the one with dementia, was sick, but he’s back to that three times a week, as well as bowling twice a week, bridge whenever he can, and bocce ball. Oh, and he works out and rides his bike on a regular basis. Like I said, he’s very active. And happy.
Of course the news about my uncle knocked him for a loop. He knows what my aunt will be facing and that hurts as well. It isn’t the time to tell her the good will come back, but hopefully his example helps her.
All we can do is live our lives.
Image Credits: Balance © Jane–stock.adobe.com; Happy Kids © mediastok.ai–stock.adobe.com; Bicycle © Lucky Step–stock.adobe.com
My World With Words 
Great advice. Change is always in the air. Sorry to hear about your uncle. Sending positive thoughts on his battle.
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Thank you! He can use all the positive energy available.
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This is great advice! And I’m sorry to hear about your uncle’s diagnosis.
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Thank you! It’s something I keep relearning. And thank you also about the kind words about my uncle. It was a shock.
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Your dad gave you such excellent advice, Belinda. I’m going to remember that. One of my art teachers gave me a great line that I love. “Slow is fast.” I always remember that when I’m rushing and making mistakes!
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I love that for the entire creative process. Slow is fast!
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Hi, Belinda. Thank you sharing this. It exposes our vulnerability to this journey of life. It is a reminder to me that gratitude is so important. We have to be grateful. Tomorrow is not promised and if we get there, surprises are not always pleasant.
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You are so right. I am increasingly aware that tomorrow is not promised, and like you said, surprises are not always pleasant. Faith becomes more important to me each passing day.
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Belinda, so nice to be back reading your thoughts again. I think as I have gotten older the rollercoaster of life has pretty much converted me to not getting too “high” or “low” emotionally because change is a constant, and indeed the happiest and saddest moments in life can be occuring at the same time. I hope you get to see your uncle and I’ll say a prayer that meeting comes to fruition.
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Good to hear from you again! And thank you for the prayer.
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Sorry to hear about your uncle, Belinda. You are right – everything changes. A wise thing to know and live by and it seems you have done that well!
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I hope so. Change can still be difficult because of the unknown. Thank you for the kind thoughts about my uncle.
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